I used to fantasize about having a big sister when I was little. I would watch TV shows and movies, like “Liv and Maddie” and “Sisters” picturing what it would be like to confide in and share secrets with someone. I would go to bed at night daydreaming about our future and the experiences we would have. Then I found one.
When I was 9, my mom announced that we were moving – it wasn’t too uncommon back then. When we did move, I decided to ask my mom if there were any children that she knew of, but sadly there was nobody. I was disappointed. Back then I was having a hard time making friends. I wasn’t very close with my peers in school or at home, my brother was busy with work and my sister hadn’t been born yet. So, to say I had a hard time socializing was an understatement.
During the spring, my mom made me go outside and go on my bike instead of watching TV, so I did. I remember making loops around my house when a teenager went outside and started hula hooping. We exchanged glances but chose to look away and continue with our activities in silence. It was like that for what I thought was hours until I mustered up the courage to say “Hi”.
She said “Hi” back.
Her name was Ainsley, she had medium-length dark brown hair, brown eyes, and was around 14, just like my brother. They didn’t go to the same school; she went to the local middle school. She liked Harry Potter and anime. We ended up spending a lot of time together. She introduced me to Harry Potter; I told her about my friend problems. She helped.
My mom really enjoyed Ainsley. Anytime I was too much or needed to go get fresh air, she sent me outside and I would knock on her door, and most of the time, she answered. She would walk me to the park, to the nearby gas station – where she would buy me gummy bears every time – and would take me to the town center.
On Thursdays in the summer, the town center had a bouncy house and music. I wasn’t allowed to go without someone with me, so I would ask Ainsley, and she would happily take me. Eventually, in fifth grade, I made other friends thanks to her advice. I even had my own “Friend Group” full of people who it was easy to socialize with. But even then, I still hung out with Ainsley out of school. We watched movies, did online quizzes, watched YouTube, laid on a blanket outside, went swimming, and made food. She could make good food, she made me lunch, breakfast, and dinner all the time.
We would have sleepovers where we would stay up until 1 am (which for a kid is very late) where we would binge shows and eat salty ramen because I loved my ramen especially salty. She cared about me like that. I remember telling her about having to pack for a weekend at my uncle’s, and she told me to have fun. Then I left.
When I came back, my mom told me we were moving again.
I was extremely upset, I was going to have to switch schools, leaving all the people I loved, including Ainsley.
I was around 12 by this, which meant for 3-4 years we spent most of our time together. She taught me how to socialize with others. Without her, I don’t think I would have been able to learn important social skills, nor would I have been able to be the person I am today. It was all in good time anyway. She was around 18 and needed to think about her future, and I needed to focus on who I was going to be. But that’s not to say we text, we wish each other happy holidays, and ask about each other’s life, just like a family.
She is my ‘sister’, she spent time with me, taught me things, put me under her wing, and did everything a big sister would do for their little sister. I am grateful for her and all the things she taught me. Even if we are biologically related, I believe we have that sisterly bond.
This article is dedicated to my ‘big sister’, Ainsley, we may not talk as much now but I hope you know just how much of an impact you made on my life.
